back to life, woot!

Hi all,

I wrote this last night (sunday night), but I had some internet issues, so I’m uploading now.
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I know I should be finishing up reading materials for my intro to public policy class, but I decided to write, because I'm the kind of kid who can't do one thing for more than half an hour. Also writing helps me stay in touch with myself AND my friends. How great is that :)? (and what a great excuse for slacking off...)

I had a great weekend, filled with fun parties and hang outs, thanks to all of my friends here :). Despite the week that had been pretty bleh, let's say, I had a blast over the weekend. Friday night was an independence celebration party for India and Pakistan. I tried my best to wear something green and orange, but unfortunately, I had no orange, so I was halfway there, dress-wise. And right before then, we were at this hello-goodbye dinner prepared by school, to send of some of the seniors who are going abroad for exchange or dual-degree programs. The food was great (free food, what can I say?) and open-mic was just priceless, especially Sarah’s amazing performance. I got to meet some of the exchange or dual-degree students who came to my school (I’ll keep referring it as LKY as Lee Kuan Yew Sch. of Pub Pol), from Germany, Switzerland, England, you name it. These are just amazing people with some of the most amazing experiences, and I do feel really honored to be here.

Anyhow, as I said earlier, the party was a blast. We all slowly headed to College Green, and all the decorations, flowers, music, food, really everything just blew my mind. You probably know that I was not such a big party-fan when I was in college, part of it because I thought it was gross and really not much going on other than binge drinking. But here, everyone got to know everyone better, really enjoying each other’s company, and I do feel grown up (well, these people are all at least in their mid-20s) among these people. You are exposed to wholesome culture and atmosphere, enjoy that food that are prepared with much love and care, appreciate the cultural differences/diversity, and have engaging conversations, not to mention dance without caring about anything but your own pure joy. Even without a drop of alcohol, you can socialize here. SURPRISE!!! Really, how do I deserve this awesome people and rich culture? And on Saturday night, the graduate school association (or something like that) organized a social/party at Sentosa, which is a beach that’s… eh… pretty cool, I suppose, although it’s pretty “constructed,” let’s say (I want to save a whole cultural comment on Singapore for later). There were a lot of LKY students, and again, I loved the atmosphere so much. Despite the fact that my phone broke (totally my fault; why was I even in the water with my purse!!!)

Growing up is a painful process, someone said, and it has had its moment in my life, I suppose. I’m still only a “freshman” in “real” life (not even that, since I’m still a student!), but it has generally treated me well and offered me with so much of… life. I know there’s a lot of studying to do, and I know that things don’t always go the way that I want it to, as I have painfully realized last week. But in the end, I think life is super awesome. You learn to bear with certain difficulties -whether it is the 45-minute commute that consists of waiting for the bus for 20 minutes every morning, a terrible heartbreak, homesick, not understanding differences, really whatever. And in the end, life has something to make you smile at the end of the day, like a pleasant conversation with a total stranger, a piece of chocolate (or a pint of ice cream), a good morning run, really anything.

Talking about growing up… have you all heard of this test called Myers-Briggs test (MBTI)? It’s basically a really detailed personality test that helps you find your strengths so that you can find professional directions in your life, and I think a lot of career centers have them for you. Anyhow, I took one in my public policy class during my first year in college (taught by one and only Tony Brown – Ahh, I miss him a lot; he inspired me to go for public policy!), and I was an INFJ, Introversion, intuition, Feeling, Judging. This was Spring 2006, let’s keep it in mind. So after 3 and half years, I happen to be on facebook one day, procrastinating. The newsfeeds (a.k.a. stalkerfeeds) tell me that one of my friends took this test on facebook quiz. Out of curiosity, I took it, obviously, and I turn out to be an ENFJ, Extroverted and etc. I was a bit struck by that since I have believed that I’m always introverted, no matter what other people say about me. It’s all about self-perception, right? Then now -after reading a little too much of social science theory stuff for my class tomorrow- ontologically and epistemologically, human beings are creatures of structure and agency, external influences and the internal identity construct. I am not just “me” but I am the result of different influences inside out. I continuously make myself depending on my environments and how I unite it with my internal energy and changes. Does it sound too zen and boring? But anyhow, despite my firm beliefs on who I am, I might not be such an inflexible being. Haven’t I continuously mentioned how I have become a different person gradually? It happened over 4 years while I was in high school, and 4 years in college. I did go through many many stages of changes and turbulences, and they all have become part of me. So after all, I may have to embrace my extroverted-self. By the way, there is no right or wrong, good or bad on one way or the other.

So it was another night of babbling about things… But please do know that I am embracing and loving myself as who I am, whatever stage of my life I might be going through. So should you ☺. Good bye my loved ones, and I promise that I will put up some photos sooner than later. For my next post, it will be probably on cultural commentary, but it really depends on my mood that day. I’m an F (feeling) after all :D. Oh shoot, I still have to read my assignments…